Two years ago, I had taken a trip to Europe, as my friend was doing schooling there. It was an amazing to experience to say the least, but with it came a lot of after-math fighting. You see, you can learn things in school like “how to deal with a dilemma” and “therapeutic use of self” all you want, but when it really boils down to you being in that situation, let’s just say that it might not be the first thing you would resort to. That’s especially the case when it becomes an attack on you and it just gets personal. And that’s exactly what happened when my friend and I fought… it boiled down to him judging me and saying “I don’t know how her parents taught her her values and morals”. And you know, that’s when I knew to just give up fighting. Because fighting with people like that, is a waste of my time.
The amazing thing is that each and every single person has their own different stories to tell. Their own experiences, pleasant or sad. And the way that they experience such things is up to them. They can either take it with a grain of salt, or they can learn from it and carry on their life with those life lessons in mind. Reality is subjective. Nothing is the same for each one of us. The thing I don’t get is that some people can say things like “You’ve never been through any hardships. You wouldn’t understand.” I’m pretty sure if you’ve been around for 20 some years, you would have had the experiences that would enable you to understand, or if not, at least try to understand. It doesn’t take a person to be through the same hardship as you to value something. And same goes for if you haven’t been through that hardship. It does not mean that you are any better or worse than that person. Why can’t we just all value each others’ experiences and take it for what it is? Why must we get so technical and judgmental to the point where you are doing exactly what you hated the most- people judging you. And that’s when debates and fights get personal to the point where you’re not even having an intellectual discussion anymore. It has just become “let’s see who is better. You or me”. And that’s that.